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Hello lovelies,

It’s a wonderful day in history. Prop 8, banning same sex marriage, was ruled unconstitutional yesterday in the final ruling by Judge Walker. While there are some issues with a current stay on issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples, this is a great step towards civil rights (although there is obviously still a lot more work to be done for trans rights and institutionalized racism).

I just went through the 138 page final ruling by Judge Walker and I’d like to post some highlights. As I told my friend Erik, each sentence is a social justice orgasm.

To read or skim the entire ruling, you can view it here.

Highlights include:

“California, like every other state, has never required that individuals entering a marriage be willing or able to procreate.” – pg 62

“the evidence shows beyond debate that allowing same-sex couples to marry has at least United States District Court For the Northern District of California a neutral, if not a positive, effect on the institution of marriage and that same-sex couples’ marriages would benefit the state. Id. Moreover, the evidence shows that the rights of those opposed to homosexuality or same-sex couples will remain unaffected if the state ceases to enforce Proposition 8. the evidence shows beyond debate that allowing same-sex couples to marry has at least United States District Court For the Northern District of California a neutral, if not a positive, effect on the institution of marriage and that same-sex couples’ marriages would benefit the state. Id. Moreover, the evidence shows that the rights of those opposed to homosexuality or same-sex couples will remain unaffected if the state ceases to enforce Proposition 8.” – pg 127

“The tradition of restricting marriage to opposite-sex couples does not further any state interest. Rather, the evidence shows that Proposition 8 harms the state’s interest in equality, because it mandates that men and women be treated differently based only on antiquated and discredited notions of gender.” – pg 126

“Because the evidence shows same-sex marriage has and will have no adverse effects on society or the institution of marriage, California has no interest in waiting and no practical need to wait to grant marriage licenses to same-sex couples.” – pg 128

“Proposition 8 does not advance any of the identified interests: (1) same-sex parents and opposite-sex parents are of equal quality, FF 69-73, and (2) Proposition 8 does not make it more likely that opposite-sex couples will marry and raise offspring biologically related to both parents” – pg 129

“Proponents argue Proposition 8 advances a state interest in encouraging the formation of stable households. Instead, the evidence shows that Proposition 8 undermines that state interest, because same-sex households have become less stable by the passage of Proposition 8. The inability to marry denies same-sex couples the benefits, including stability, attendant to marriage.” – pg 130

“To the extent proponents argue that one of the rights of those morally opposed to same-sex unions is the right to prevent same-sex couples from marrying, as explained presently those individuals’ moral views are an insufficient basis upon which to enact a legislative classification.” – pg 132

“when the Court asked whether a majority of citizens could use the power of the state to enforce “profound and deep convictions accepted as ethical and moral principles” through the criminal code. 539 US at 571. The question here is whether California voters can enforce those same principles through regulation of marriage licenses. They cannot. California’s obligation is to treat its citizens equally, not to “mandate [its] own moral code.” – pg 135

“The evidence shows, however, that Proposition 8 played on a fear that exposure to homosexuality would turn children into homosexuals and that parents should dread having children who are not heterosexual.” – pg 136

Enjoy these highlights, and feel free to send these off to friends, loved ones and those who disagree with todays ban!

Recently Drew Deveaux worked with Buck Angel to create a new PSA encouraging trans women to get prostate exams. If a trans woman takes estrogen therapy, her chances of prostate cancer are reduced, but there is still a risk. Get yourself checked!

Drew wrote a fantastic blog post about her PSA. Drew is one of the few, but strong, queer porn activists. She fucks well on camera and educates a diverse range of people on trans rights. I particularly enjoy her work on developing the term “cisnormativity,” which you can read more about in her blog post.

For more information, click here for a quick fact sheet on health and wellness for trans women by LGBThealth.net.

As much as I’d like this post to be “yay! awareness and sex and love!” It should be noted how much shit Buck Angel, along with many others, puts up with due to his work and who he is. Recently Buck published on his twitter feed a response to his PSA:

“You fucking suck You fake piece of shit. Your twisted amusement damages too fucking much. I can’t get proper medical care because of the perversion you have taxed the doctors with Your lies, for your Halloween costumes. Men don’t have pussies it is incompatible with male chemistry asshole”

I wanted to post the hate that Buck receives to keep everyone aware. Sometimes hate and discrimination are in your face, and other times it’s a little more subtle. Get your pronouns right, people. Respect the pronoun a person uses. And don’t assume you know the pronoun. Furthermore, everyone has a right to proper health care, everyone has a right to live how they see fit. This isn’t Halloween, this isn’t for twisted amusement. This is life.

Keep yourself in check, and get checked.

Studio: All Worlds Video

With straight porn churning out parodies of every sitcom and popular movie ever made, I have been asked if there is such a thing as gay porn parodies. Well of course there are! My favorite being The Hole (2002), a parody of the Japanese horror classic The Ring (1998), where football players and frat boys watch a movie that seven days later makes them gay! Dun dun dun! However, by far my favorite gay porn parody in terms of just the title is Whorrey Potter and The Sorcerer’s Balls (2010). I’ve yet to see it, but thank god its in 3D!

The sad thing about most of the gay porn parodies I’ve come across, and the same goes for straight porn parodies, is that the satire does not often go beyond the title and perhaps a few costume choices. Homopop.com wrote an article on the fascination with Jersey Shore turning into a porn parody, capitalizing off of the recent (although completely unfathomable to me) guido ideal.

But if you’re too busy debating Team Edward vs Team Jacob, there is always Twinklight (2010). Watch the trailer below:

However, in my opinion the best bang for your buck is Otto: Or, Up With Dead People (2008), a feature film by Bruce La Bruce about a gay zombie who comes into society to learn about his past. Click here for the trailer, you have to be signed in to YouTube in order to watch it, unfortunately. Which, by the way, is total bullshit because the only thing that’s suggestive is topless men kissing.

What are your favorite gay or straight porn parodies?

Iconic Image of the Bearded Lady

In August of 2009 I started a new Masters program in Psychology with an emphasis on Marriage, Family Therapy. To say that transitioning from a Masters program in Sexuality Studies to Psychology has been different is like saying sharks and the fish currently in my living room losing scales is different. Recently I came across a class meeting that really irked me. I mean, really irked me. I was a bit stunned mixed with livid. We were discussing gender in terms of adolescent development and someone raised their hand and brought up a long-winded and meaningless story about a “hermaphrodite” they once knew. I immediately said out loud, “you mean intersex,” but no one paid attention. The professor then went on to explain that “hermaphrodites” are fascinating in terms of gender and society, mind you, not correcting the use of that term. I raised my hand and said, “People who happen to be intersex are often met with discrimination, you’re right.” I was trying to go for the more subtle approach in correcting my professor. This was glossed over. The professor then said, “do you know what occupation a lot of hermaphrodites end up in? do you? The circus. Yeah, that’s right, the circus. I don’t remember the statistics but its something like 50% of them. It’s because thats the only place they aren’t met with discrimination.” The students nodded and wrote this down.

After a bit of grumbling and gasping I explained that this was totally untrue and that she was confusing people who are intersex with the guy who wears a half gown and half tuxedo (who’s just a performer, by the way) and stated that “hermaphrodite” is really the wrong terminology to use. But I felt like I didn’t explain enough. In all honesty, I was too amazed by the absurdity of it all to battle this out right away. This is something I’d like to get better at. Below is the letter I wrote to my professor explaining why what she had said in class was incredibly incorrect and continues the discrimination against people who happen to be intersex. Thanks to this email, the professor spent the first 15-20 minutes of the next class apologizing to the students for what she had said. She then went on to give an explanation as to why she was wrong, and a history on discrimination towards these people. Please enjoy my letter and comment below if you feel like I said anything in error or left something important out.

Keep in mind, I had decided that the best way for me to approach this letter was to acknowledge that she was not trying to be malicious when she said these things in class, but to inform her that what she said was not helping in the slightest.

_________________________________

Hello Dr. [name removed],

I have truly been enjoying our class and the reading, however I wanted to send you a note after our class on Monday wherein you referred to intersex individuals as “hermaphrodites” and stated that 50% of these individuals end up working in the circus because this was the only place they could find work. As someone who recently finished his Masters degree in Sexuality Studies and works for the rights of others in sexual minorities, I want to say that I appreciate your intention to express the discrimination that intersex individuals are met with. However, I wanted to bring up a few points that I felt needed to be addressed.

While the term “hermaphrodite” was generally accepted in academia and the medical community for quite some time, it is an inaccurate term that is entirely offensive (and I want to make it absolutely clear that in no way did I believe you were trying to be offensive). Hermaphrodite is a mythological term for someone who has both male and female sex organs, which is physically impossible. Intersex refers to the ambiguity not only of genitals but also regarding internal genitalia, sex chromosomes and hormones. Disorders of Sex Development (DSD) is currently the most accepted terminology in the medical community, but “disorder” is never a nice word. We often want to avoid labeling someone as one thing, which then ignores the full embodiment of this persons life and personality. The organization Intersex Society of North America offers a great FAQ section wherein they address the difference between hermaphrodite and intersex.

Also, you claimed that 50% of individuals who are intersex work in the circus, as a form of last resort employment. While I understand where you were coming from in this statement, that individuals who happen to be intersex are discriminated against and persecuted to the point where they are left to profit off of their disorder. However, a majority of individuals who are intersex rarely look different from someone who is not intersex. They may exhibit some androgynous qualities, but the circus statement conjures up images of the bearded woman. Why I bring this up is I am concerned as to how the students took in this information. I am afraid that they will continue to view intersex individuals as just being bearded women, without understanding the intricacies of this disorder. I fear that if they have a client who outs themself as intersex their first reaction will be, “a hermaphrodite?! How’d you get out of the circus?!”

Furthermore, the true tragedy of intersex is not the disorder itself, but how these individuals are treated by medical professionals. Many of these people are treated like a freak show by doctors, surgeons and researchers where they are subjected to invasive, traumatic genital surgeries and photo documentation.

The wonderful thing about academia and science is that it is constantly evolving, and hopefully in a way that benefits individuals, rather than continuing to hurt them. The term “hermaphrodite” changing to intersex, is a great example of this evolution. Not only does it open the doors towards acceptance, reducing the impact of “othering,” it also creates a discussion in the medical community on how best to treat such individuals. Treatment, which should not immediately (if at all) include sex reassignment surgery and hormone therapy before puberty. For this type of treatment is largely based on fitting individuals into a binary of male or female rather than accepting (as many other cultures have) that gender identity can be fluid and ever-changing.

Once again, I want to be very clear that in no way did I think you were intentionally trying to be dismissive of intersex individuals, I rather appreciate your intention to even bring up this topic in the discussion of gender. Bringing up intersex individuals opens a pandoras box of sorts that leads to a never ending debate involving what aspects of gender are socially constructed, how the binary of male and female is not good enough (See Anne Fausto-Sterling’s book “Sexing the Body“), medicalization of bodies (Foucault) and so on.

I truly wanted to use this as an opportunity to create a discussion around gender, sexuality, medicalization of bodies, etc. Below are some resources that you may find interesting:

Intersex Society of North America
Cheryl Chase, creator of ISNA
Accord Alliance

Thank you again for taking the time to read this and making me feel comfortable enough to approach you with this email.

All the best,
David Khalili

Taxis are everywhere in Dubai

After going to the top of the Burj Khalifa and walking around in the heat I just wanted to get to the hotel and wash off the sand and scent of Fendi. At the Dubai Mall I grabbed a taxi instead of taking the metro  in order to get to the hotel as soon as humanly possible. The taxi driver was stone faced and quiet, after a few moments I asked him how his day was. He explained that he had just been at the Dubai Mall to buy gifts for family and was just starting his shift. To be honest, he seemed a tad bitter at this form of small talk. I started my conversation with him because I wanted to hear about his experience as a taxi driver in Dubai. For some reason I decided that the best way to start this discussion was to tell him how taxis work in America. “In America the taxi drivers pay a certain amount at the beginning of their shift and then they keep the rest of the money they make from the shift.” He nodded, “that’s a good system to have,” almost saying this through gritted teeth. I asked him how the taxi system in Dubai worked. He looked at me in the rear view mirror from behind his sunglasses and simply said, “it’s fucked up, sir.” I wasn’t exactly expecting that sort of blunt response. “If I do a taxi drive for 40 dirhams, I give the company 40 dirhams. If I do 1000 dirhams, I give them 1000 dirhams. They give me a small wage but that is just enough to eat,” putting his hand to his mouth simulating eating. “They fine us for anything. Going over the speed limit, they know and fine us. Being late, they fine us. Anything. Last year they fined me 20,000 dirhams from my paycheck” which is roughly $5,500 USD. I didn’t exactly feel comfortable enough with him to ask what he makes a year, but I have read in different places that a taxi driver makes roughly $400-1000 a month in Dubai. I was starting to feel like a real asshole after explaining to him how the taxi system works in America.

He explained to me that the entire system is in shambles. If he has a complaint he has no idea where to go. When he talks to “quality control” they give him no information, when he asks who they report to they say they don’t know. However, they are always quick to fine him. He and other taxi drivers I talked to mentioned that they drive nice cars, wear a uniform that resembles a military outfit being that it is very crisp, and has epaulets. One taxi driver told me that he had always dreamed of joining the military in Pakistan, but because of an illness he was unable to join. He went on to say, “God chose for me not to be in the military, but to be a taxi driver. At least I have these,” and pointed to the epaulet on his shoulder, laughing nervously.

The stone faced taxi driver continued explaining that last year an Australian man was looking to buy the taxi system from the government. Oh right, did I mention that the taxi’s are controlled by the government of Dubai? Well they are, and this leads to even more problems. This man was going to revamp the cars, equip them with more up to date GPS systems and so on. However, at the last moment when the man insisted that he would select the new management the government of Dubai quickly pulled back from the offer and it was never spoken of again.

“What’s your schedule like?” I asked this to a few taxi drivers and they all had the same response. They sighed and said, “12 hours a day, 7 days a week. If I’m sick, too bad. I still have to work. If I want the day off because I am sick or to see family, I have to pay the company. I lose money from not working and I have to pay them on top of that.”

I asked the stone faced driver if he came to Dubai from Pakistan to work as a taxi driver. He nodded, “I was promised a great job, lots of money. My plan was to save money, send to my family and have money when I go back to Pakistan.” Which led to my next question, “When do you plan on going back to Pakistan?” Another sigh, “When you start this job after coming into the country they take your passport. They have my passport. When they have that, they have a remote control of you. Whatever they say, you do, because all you want is your passport back so you can leave this place. I want to see my family again.” A few years back I had read an article on construction workers in Dubai who were sent in from various countries, all of them had their passports taken from them when they started the job and it was almost impossible to get it back. I had no idea that they did this for other members of the working class. The taxi driver continued, “We are allowed to ask to resign once every six months. I have asked three times and each time they rejected my request,” another sigh, “I just asked a month ago, now I have to wait another 5 months.” These men are indentured servants. Make no mistake.

Learning all of this left me stunned. In a city where wealth and opulence is falling out of peoples asses, where every mall has stores that sell $10,000 cell phones, Fendi and Cartier, where there are numerous “worlds biggest” such and such, there is also a tremendous amount of devastating poverty. All of this poverty obviously being created in order to keep the wealthy incredibly rich. With Dubai’s economy continuing to fail, there is even less hope for these taxi drivers to make the amount of money they were promised. But hopefully if it completely fails they will then be allowed to go back home.

ORGASM!

Recently a friend, lets call her Ms. A., contacted me with an interesting occurrence in her sex life. She wrote to me explaining that starting about six months to a year ago whenever she would become highly aroused or near orgasm detailed images would flash in front of her. In her first experience with this she saw a depiction of a forest covered in snow. Other times she would see flying saucers, castles in the moon light and fireworks. These images never lasted longer than a split second flash. The main point of her contacting me was, “is this normal?” To be totally honest my initial reaction to hearing this was, “I WANT THAT!” Seems like the intense sort of orgasms people strive for. I’m looking at you Michael Hutchence. Too soon?

A part of me wondered if there was an aspect of disassociation going on here, where the experience is so intense that she takes herself to another place. However, this didn’t seem like such an instance because they’re quick flashes rather than complete disassociation. Another idea that crossed my mind grapes was the idea that she’s getting a surge of endorphins that are flooding her brain in a way that all these intense emotions and imagery associated with positive feelings are flashing in front of her (a theory that was later confirmed by a friend, which I will discuss in a bit).

I wanted to know more about these awesome flashes so I asked her a few probing (har har) questions. Her point of view in these flashes are not internal, she’s watching these scenes from afar. The only time she has these flashes are when her boyfriend goes down on her. Go boyfriend, go! The images regarding winter scenes are the most vivid, but she said she is most obsessed with that particular season. God help this woman if she goes skiing. After the act of sexing and orgasm she states that she likes to remember the images because they are “artistically beautiful.” I’d imagine those scenes are from now on etched in the pleasure center of her brain.

A little bit after Ms. A. contacted me I had a conversation with Ms. B. I mentioned a friend of mine who was having flashes of intense and beautiful images when highly aroused or near orgasm. Ms. B. nodded knowingly. Wait, did I just find another flash orgasmer?! I did! Ms. B. explained that she has been having these flashes of images with orgasm since her very first petit mort . She explained that her first orgasm was accompanied by a wine glass. Sadly, her next orgasm was interrupted with a quick flash of a close up of Patrick Stewart’s face. Engage! What Ms. B experiences that Ms A does not is that Ms B’s images change and distort when her orgasms get more intense. Patrick Stewarts face, for example, stretched from top to bottom getting thinner and thinner until it disappeared.

ENGAGE!

So I think we can all agree that this, my friends, is all sorts of amazing! Does anyone else experience this? Or does anyone experience something similar to this? Please let us know, you can comment below confidentially (entering in fake information), if you so desire.

Scene From The Big Lebowski - A XXX Parody

Well fellow humans, it’s finally happened. They’ve released a porn parody of The Big Lebowski! Judging from the trailer this may be the best porn parody I’ve come across. I’m definitely going to have to view this.  It features Kimberly Kane, James Deen and Tom Byron. Well done.

Purchase here.

Thoughts?

To learn more about the G Spot, enjoy this video produced and directed by Good Vibrations!

(C) BBC America

This weeks’ Fetish Friday is geared (har har) towards those who have sex with their cars. So far I’ve only come across instances of men who are sexually interested in their cars. The instances of women sexualizing their cars are only in terms of women being sexualized by not knowing how to control their cars, car stuck fetish and pedal pumping, as an example. I must admit, when I first heard about this I immediately thought of the scene in Beverly Hills Cop where Eddie Murphy put a banana in the cops tail pipe…except the banana is a penis…get it? Unfortunately it’s not that comical or at the very least that painful. Hot metal and sharp edges, oh baby I like it raw.

In most of the cases I’ve seen the men caress the cars, rub themselves up against the body, and mostly masturbate near or on the car area. Sometimes the cars are their own, i.e. their partner, and other times they do a little sneaky jerk on someone elses automobile. In this case, a man was arrested on three separate occasions for masturbating on the hoods of other peoples cars. In an interview with a mechanic from the UK, he admits/brags about having an exhaust pipe widened in order to fit his presumably ginormous penis. That car is such a size queen.

Perhaps my favorite account of this fetish is depicted in the made for TV documentary by BBC America “My Car is My Lover.” BBC America, never one to give up on documenting the bizarre, arranged for two car fetishists to take a road trip (brilliant idea) to meet each other at a car convention. I imagine BBC America supplied the extra pants, because the men are ejaculating in their own…their own pants…because of all the cars. What I truly enjoyed about this documentary is that they explored the relationships these men carry with their own cars and how they view cars around them. I’ve embedded the first part of the series on YouTube below. Beneath the video are the links to the rest of the show if you want to watch the rest, and I think you do. Thank you to my friends Seth & Amy who introduced me to the documentary!

Enjoy!

Part 1:

Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

Example of a Full Body Image

Last year the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) began discussing the use of full body scanners as a form of heightened security. With this scanner, agents can see everything, and I do mean everything. Just look at this picture! It seems as though this man on the right has a catheter connecting his junk to his gun so that he shoots his leg every time he urinates, damn terrorist. Now due to recent terror alerts, the TSA has begun implementing full body scanners at every major airport. While there has been a somewhat underwhelming cry for privacy rights, most people are simply falling in line and doing “whatever is necessary to protect us against terrorists.”

What is of concern to me is what will happen to a trans person when they step into the body scanner. What will the TSA see? How will they react? With the recent attempted underwear bombing on Christmas, the TSA will most likely be focusing their attention on the peoples junk. With these new scanners, TSA agents will be able to see binding material and genitals, causing concern that the TSA agents may pull the trans person aside for further investigation/searching.

I met with Jackson Bowman, a researcher for UCSF, homeless youth advocate and tran about town, to discuss issues regarding full body scanners, trans rights and privacy. After enjoying our libations at a dimly lit bar and catching up, Jackson said “so you want to know my thoughts on trannies and body scanners?” To begin with, Jackson said he doesn’t understand why cisgendered people aren’t completely upset by this invasion of privacy. Full body scanners are not just something that should concern trans folk, but these should concern all people.

When asked about his current experience going through airport security, Jackson noted that he already sweats bullets when he flies. He recently went to Europe, and due to the trip he got a new passport. Even though he went through the process of changing his birth certificate, ID and passport to match his gender he became worried every time he handed someone his passport. He would think they had a super scanner to find out that something was “off” about his passport, and even though he knew this wasn’t true, he would still get anxious. “It’s fine, everything has been changed,” he’d think, only to be followed with “what if they find out its been changed?!”

Jackson stated that he’s afraid that someone will accuse him of being “inauthentic,” or hiding “the truth,” something he finds himself coming across on occasion when meeting others. In this case his concern is that if the TSA accuses him of being inauthentic or hiding something, then they may search further.

Jackson is not only concerned for the confusion that TSA agents may have when they see genitals that they do not believe to match the person’s gender, but also for a trans man who is packing. Whether it’s a trans man who is wearing a softie or a trans woman who is wearing falsies, it may appear to the TSA agent as if this person is trying to smuggle something on the plane. This would also be an issue for a breast cancer survivor who had a mastectomy and is wearing falsies.

It’s been claimed many times that the images from the full body scanners are not connected to the persons identity, that they are viewed by agents in an office far away and are immediately deleted after first view. However, in early February the famous Bollywood actor Shah Rukh Khan quickly found out that the images from his full body scan were passed around by security agents in the very airport he was in. Two of the female agents even approached him right after the full body scan with the print outs of his naked body in hand, asking for his autograph. If this kind of behavior happens for celebrities, whats stopping the same thing happening to trans folk?

Will there be competency training for TSA agents? My pessimistic side says most likely not. But I would like to see more of a push for such training. Overall, I’d like to see this type of invasion of privacy to put away for good.

For more information:

Transgender Equality Whole Body Image FAQ